Legs Like Twigs

The last 2-3 weeks have been extremely difficult for many reasons.  Tuesday it seemed to come to a head.  The song on Bethel Music's new album Tides sums it up quite accurately:

The wind and waves surround me
And I'm tossed, feel like I'm drowning
I am tired, I am weak
I need You here with me

'Cause I can feel the rising tide
But I don't have the strength to fight
I feel clouded and confused
I need you here with me

Yesterday I made a clear choice to only let the Lord protect me.  This means not retreating in an effort to protect myself, not taking the easy road and false comfort the enemy would provide, nor numbing myself with my own false comforts as to try and control the chaos by ignoring it or pushing it away.

This morning I spent time with the Lord outside on my deck.  This is what He spoke to me:

You are strong
You are strong because I Am in you
Rise up again in your authority
Rise up again in your authority
Stand on the solid ground

This verse Psalms 40:2 came to mind: "He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire.  He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along."

I then immediately saw a little bird land on my deck railing.  It just stood there looking around trying to decide where to go next.  I noticed it's legs since the last thing spoken to me was to stand on solid ground.  It's legs looked like little twigs.  It made me think that not only can I stand with weak, twig-like legs, but that it's almost preferred...

Here's why.

If the bird's legs were heavy little masses then it would no longer have the ability to fly -- to soar so high in the clouds.  So if I'm willing to stand up on the solid ground knowing that I will feel every bit of vulnerability in my frail legs, that is faith (trust in the Lord).

And if I have faith (trust in the Lord) to stand then I will soar on wings like eagles.

Getting up now.